Mike Duffy

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What?! Is there such a newsgr... Ah sorry, hadn't finished reading your post.

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I've been pondering this for quite a while now. I'm still struggling to subtract wall from brick. I've managed to subtract a brick from the wall but that's just got Jane seriously pissed and given me a re-plastering headache. I've got no idea how I then add a head to the resulting mathematical tangle, but I'm pretty sure it'll give me another headache.

:p Hey Zimon mate! You never saw my posts when I was paralytic did you? Don't worry, I've never seen anyone degenerate to that sad state of affairs under the influence, so my crown's badly in need of some polishing.

Ok. It's wrong.

The grammar may be terrible but you can't fault the man's physics! Couldn't have put it better myself.

Yeah right! And who's going to protect you from mass man?

Ajay, don't start talking to another girl about latex... Nelson will explode. Anyway, I'm off. No one likes me and everyone thinks I'm a retard...

Now either Vicky or Nelson has a wicked sense of humour. I'll leave it up to you to make your own minds up.

True. Not like hitting a brick wall at all. It's like hitting the other car! So in your example, for the Fiesta it's like hitting a truck and for the truck it's like hitting a Fiesta, oddly enough! Which (and it's still paining me to say this so so so much) is what Nelson said originally.

Sorry mate. Pedant here. You can't just sum the individual energies of the cars. Nelson is right here unfortunately. You have to sum the velocities separately first then calculate the energy of the crash. Velocity is totally relative and there is only one velocity in the calculation. If you want another way of viewing this, imagine the objects crashing in space away from any other object. There is no way to measure the velocity of either object without taking it relative to another object considered as "stationery". With the absence of anything else, you would have to take one of the objects as a reference point which means the combined velocity would be applied to the other object. Now crashes next to a large mass, such as the Earth, do have significant extra parts to the calculation. However, to calculate the simplistic energy of the impact, you must still use the combined velocity in the initial calculation. I thank you.

Warren mate, your left, right and centre are all churls.

And from past experience he won't be back. Hang on...

I was just reading the old mass guru's post on cylinder deactivation when a thought occured to me. Now, I and most other people on the forum (mentioning no names) utilise a spongy thinking device containing two hemispheres. Now recent posts got me thinking. Two hemispheres are good for such things as going to work (in a thinking profession obviously, not a Z mechanic!), studying (arts students excepted) and general analytical duties. However, most of us spend a considerable amount of time indulging in such activities as watching telly, eating dinner and talking to our better halves (Ajay and Wendy excepted obviously). Now surely, these activities are wasting a lot of energy using two hemispheres. Surely if there was some way we could shut down one hemisphere we could save one hell of a lot of energy and therefore require less sleep, less food, etc, and have far more time for drinking Stella. However, as drinking Stella (of which I may have had some of tonight, I'll let you formulate your own judgements on that) supposedly kills off brain cells, are we maybe not doing ourself a big favour. Less brain cells, less energy spent on thinking, more time to drink Stella. It's a friendly cycle that's also good for the environment. I thank you.

Nelson, me old mass guru, have you ever been in a Z running on five cylinders. Take one of your ignition wires off and go for a spin. Runs like a bag of spanners! Now three cylinders... don't think so. But, fair do's, there's nothing better than a post by my main man Nelson entitled, "Now then guys, how's this for an idea? ..." Good work.

Thanks for the advice guys. Yes it's definately the big ends, I've come to recognise the noise. So, I'll probably give it a go from underneath the car then. Can't imagine the shell bearings are too much and in my innocent naivety it doesn't seem like a massive job! Mike

Does this mean everyone's in agreement that it's a piece of piss?

The manual does suggest a method of removing the sump which appears at first quite straight forward. Presumably once the sump is removed, the big end bearing caps are easy to get out and remove. Thoughts?

Keep the noise down will you?

Right. Penis that I am, I let the engine run low on oil recently and now I've got some mild big end bearing noise. So these have obviously taken some damage and I'm thinking about rectifying this before things get any worse. Now opinions are very greatfully received on this as I'm not sure how to go about this or even if it's worth it. I've done this before on other cars from underneath with the engine in place. Does anyone know if this is possible, worthwhile and workable on a Z? If so, how easy is it? Pulling the engine isn't an option as I'm too busy etc. So opinions please. Can it be done and how easy? Cheers all Mike

Yes please Craig! Congrats again Wendy. I'm sat here covered in paint from getting our little room ready for our new arrival in July!

Anyway, do you want to expand on that? Can I take it you're implying aqueous form as opposed to aquatic?

Boys and girls, now then now then. (Grammatically not the best constructed sentence ever I admit but, nevertheless, still acceptable after this quantity of Stella!) Leave my crown alone! It's not yours Ajay, you lost it fair and square. And no one else can lay claim to it either, 'coz you've got to be a more pedantic tw*t than me to get it and that's blatantly impossible. I thank you.

What? You mean the water soaks through your boots onto your socks? Get better boots!