Gio

But you don't know the video he's on about, then? ;) - Gio

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle yesterday when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position and course to steer to the airport. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, drew a handwritten sign, and held it in the helicopter's window. The pilot's sign said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER" The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the co-pilot asked the pilot how the "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER" sign helped determine their position. The pilot responded "I knew that had to be the MICROSOFT building because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer." And while I was looking for the above I found an IT joke that's new to me at least: A tourist walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, another customer walked in and said to the shopkeeper, I'll have a C monkey please. The shopkeeper nodded, went over to a cage at the side of the shop and took out a monkey. He fitted a collar and leash, handed it to the customer, saying, "That'll be £5000." The customer paid and walked out with his monkey. Startled, the tourist went over to the shopkeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey. Why did it cost so much?" The shopkeeper answered, "Ah, that monkey can program in C - very fast, tight code, no bugs, well worth the money." The tourist looked at the monkey in another cage. "That one's even more expensive! £10,000! What does it do?" "Oh, that one's a C++ monkey; it can manage object-oriented programming, Visual C++, even some Java. All the really useful stuff," said the shopkeeper. The tourist looked around for a little longer and saw a third monkey in a cage of its own. The price tag around its neck read £50,000. He gasped to the shopkeeper, "That one costs more than all the others put together! What on earth does it do?" The shopkeeper replied, "Well, I haven't actually seen it do anything, but the other monkeys call him the project manager. Both stolen from http://www.c-wilkie.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/jokes/computing_jokes1.html Cheers - Gio

Just had to say that, of course, the fastest JUN car is still, 12 years later, the ever-wondrous 300ZX http://www.junauto.co.jp/democar/jb-z32/index.html?en :D - Gio

Hi Ajay http://300zx-twinturbo.com/cgi-bin/manual.cgi HTH - Gio

I went to ATS and the first one they sold me was the wrong way round. When I rang to complain, they found the right one and came straight round to fit it! I think the one they fitted was a Fiamm premium. £68.95. Lots of cranking speed - or amps or whatever they keep in there. Don't think it's ever been more keen to start!

OEM replacement spoiler from http://www.zcentre.co.uk or http://www.mjpauto.com - and lots of not OEM ones as well! HTH - Gio

OK Steve, just spoke to my M3 owning buddy (1999 R). The tappety-noise on start-up happens on his as well. He says that there's quite a lot of hydraulic-y things under the bonnet so you can get strange noises as temp warms up. His problem was caused by stripped camshaft bearings which apparently was a known problem on this engine. There is a (normal) noise coming up to 3,000 revs which is caused by the construction of the exhaust. But his started sounding "wrong" and getting worse as the engine warmed up. So he took it to local specialists who said "hmmmm - sounds like the camshaft problem, get it checked by a dealer." He did and they said "yersss, sounds like the camshaft bearings". End result - 2 engine rebuilds on warranty. (They didn't get it right first time). Good luck - Gio

Hang on a minute - wasn't there a fireman in Village People?

My mate's got an M3 and it had to have its engine rebuilt twice by BMW under warranty. Seems OK now but sounded like a complete nightmare. He's coming over later and I'll post the details. Cheers - Gio

No contest - buy another Z. IMHO. At least you'll know what to look for! Good luck - Gio

Congrats to the three of you. 3 people, 2 males, 1 female. Who did all the hard work? :) On the occasion of her first-born, an old mate of ours quipped "Christ, it's like sh*tting a pineapple - I'm not doing that again!" Cheers - Gio

And in addition to the usual advice about get anti-virus, keep dfinitions updates, get a good firewall etc, can I mention http://www.mailwasher.net It's free. You can check your e-mail account and delete spam, viruses and anything you don't like the look of before you fire up your e-mail program. Works a treat. Cheers - Gio

Sounds like a problem I just had (for the second time). The door lock/unlock is cable operated (standard). When remote is fitted, you install a motor(solenoid) to pull/push the door lock mechanism. So when you plip the remote it disarms and fires the solenoid to unlock. If this solenoid becomes disconnected from the door lock mechanism, you still hear the clunk but it appears to do nothing. Last year, this happened when I was inside the car. The door stopped working and I had to climb across to the passenger side to get our. Cause was a broken door lock cable. Happened again a few weeks ago and I called a local bloke out who pointed out that the original fitter had simply clamped the solenoid fixing point onto the door cable. And after a few thousand repeats of being wiggled back and forth, it fatigued and broke. What the fitter should have done was make up a bracket to link the solenoid directly to the door lock rather than bolting it to the cable. Perhaps this is what has happened to yours?

ditto one and all - my Zed is one of my favourite things and this forum has helped me enjoy / appreciate it a lot more. So thank you ladeez'n'gennelmen - may you have the Xmas you desire and the New Year you deserve. And IMHO every Z owner / forum member deserves a better next year! *And I wish it could be Christmas every day-he-hay.....* Cheers - Gio

hahahahaha lol

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallows it whole. The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?" The guy says "No, what?" "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table --- whole!" "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff". He finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the Monkey ate, then leaves. Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his bum, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" "No, what?" replies the guy. "Well, he stuck a cherry up his bum, pulled it out, and ate it!" said the bartender. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me", replied the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since the cue ball incident, he measures everything first."

100% with you on this one. I just wouldn't go round using the phrase kit-car anywhere where Macca or Liberace and others can hear :D Oh look, Leonardo, can you just widen the frame and change Mona's cape to flip paint - will look luverly. Except for clear side lights and clear front indicators - of course they are 100% top mods especially on a silver Z which is the best colour. Cheers - Gio

Warren - nothing wrong with your opinion. I don't fully agree but it's your opinion. Me - I prefer manuals but would concede, just, that perhaps there is just a smidgen of less-interestingness between a manual and an auto Z. OTOH, I would consider an auto Zed a zillion times less dull than just about any other car. Senna - shouldn't that be a "Royale with cheese"? Darkman2 - yep, your zed is the baddest on the island - and that includes the Skyline and Honda POSs (just picking a fight with non-Zed owners...) teehee - Gio

Well you learn something new every day. I dimly remembered from skool that octane did have something to do with how much energy was released when it burnt. So I surfed off to go and find the evidence that would prove you all wrong and start a fight (there's nothing finer than pouring unleaded on a roaring fire!). But nope, I was wrong. Again :rolleyes: Some links here http://www.schoolscience.co.uk/content/5/chemistry/catalysis/catsch3pg9.html http://www.stealth.fsnet.co.uk/page10.html So octane is to do with anti-knock rather than power. Cheers - Gio

UK dash gauges are calibrated in psi. J-spec ones in x100mmHg (hundreds of mm of Mercury. One atmosphere or bar can support a column of mercury 750mm (from memory)) a converter is here (and it converts lots of other stuff too) http://www.convertit.com/Go/Convert...t/Converter.ASP Pressure UK spec J spec 0.48 bar = 7 psi = 3.6 100mmHg 0.6 bar = 8.7 psi = 4.5 0.62 bar = 9psi = 4.7 0.93 bar = 13.5psi = 7 1 bar = 14.5 psi = 7.5 x100mmHg = 750mmHg (copied and pasted from somewhere else as I am bone idle :) ) Cheers - Gio

Thought you would be interested in the following info I got from Shell. (Not getting at ukmark - just maybe the motorsport company who gave you duff info and should have been better informed.) First an e-mail And a zipped Word doc which is their spec sheet. This isn't independent but I would have thought Shell were usually quite reliable.... Cheers - Gio

3 years 5 months Cheers - Gio

Never mind, Clarkey - some of us appreciated the effort. Cheers - Gio

good one, Dave - quite right - Gio

Or perhaps I should have said "on behalf of pussies" :D http://freespace.virgin.net/patricia.dymock/tt.html Me and the other half are just about to spend a week being ripped to shreds by feral and semi-feral cats in Fuerteventura. The point being to treat their ills and neuter them (dunk, cross yer legs - oh, too late!). If any of you feel minded to help - drop Twinkle Trust a line. Or just be nice to the animals you care about :) Cheers - Gio