JonLowndes101

:rofl: :rofl: Ace!!!! :D

Very Bizarre!!! ;) http://www.evilchili.com/mediaview/1750/Darth_Vader_Calls_The_Emperor__Robot_Chicken.

Happy Birthday Dude, Hope you've had a good 'un!!! :duffer: :duffer: :duffer: :duffer:

Happy Birthday Dude!!! :duffer: :duffer:

>The following are all replies that British women have put on Child >Support Agency forms in the section for listing father's details: > > > >These are genuine excerpts from the forms. Be sure to check number 11,It >takes the prize. > > > >1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was >fathered by Jim Munson. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of >child B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same night. > > > >2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was >being sick out of a window when taken unexpectedly from behind. I can >provide you with a list of names of men that I think were at the party >if this helps. > > > > >3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was >conceived at a party at 36 Grand Avenue where I had unprotected sex with >a man I met that night. I do remember that the sex was so good that I >fainted. If you do manage to track down the father, can you send me his >phone number? Thanks. > > > >4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a >BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door >panels.Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area, and >see if he's had it replaced. > > > >5. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the Pope >confirming that my son's conception was immaculate and that he is Christ >risen again. > > > >6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that to >do so would blow his cover and that would have >cataclysmic implications >for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right >by the country. Please advise. > > > >7. I do not know who the father of my child was as all squaddies look >the same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket. > > > >8. Peter Smith is the father of child A. If you do catch p with him, can >You ask him what he did with my AC/DC CDs? > > > >9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at >Euro-Disney; maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom. > > > >10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I remember >for sure is Delia Smith did a program about eggs earlier in the >evening.If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV rather than going to >the party at 146 Miller Drive, mine might have remained unfertilised. > > > >11. I am unsure as to the >identity of the father of my baby, after all >when you eat a can of beans you can't be sure which one made you fart. :D

Genius!!! :rofl: :rofl:

:confused: Dave, You been on the old Disco Piss again????!!! :confused:

Can't wait for PS3!!! GT Will be Amazing!!!! :bow:

Yep mine too after A new engine and upgraded HKS Tubs... Been on the road and working 100% for 1 year and 2 months now!!! :hyper:

Down In The SouthWest, Redruth, Cornwall... Richards Bros Ltd... http://www.richardsbros.com 01209 212234

Ok ere good joke time What does John Prescott and an MFI flatpack have in common ???? A few screws in the wrong place and the whole fookin cabinet falls apart!!!

Happy Birthday Russ! :duffer: :duffer: :duffer: :duffer:

Is anyone on here use Reason 3.0+ as a sequencer or to compose any music on... Just updated mine to the latest version, it's an amazing program with amazing sounds too.. All the classic analogue synths + Poly Synths etc... Liam Howlett from the Prodigy used the sounds and Sequencer in Reason on the last Album.. The rest of it was finished off in Pro Tools... :hyper:

Yaaayyy!!! Top Gears Back!!! :hyper:

Cheers, but i've done that too.. Disable the HP Splash screen and all you get is what Ram yer running, graphics card, and what drives are enabled!!! I know what numbers your on about but nothing on this bios!!! DOH!!! Have tried searching the net for some kind of Phonix Bios editor but there is just nothing... Guess I'm gonna have to get a new Mother board to utilize the extra power..

Hi James! Have tried this but even before the BIOS screen there is no letters or numbers...

Unfortunetly HP only have Phonix Bios 4.0 Version 6 which still won't let me adjust the CPU multiplyers to get the speed up... :cry:

Hiya All!!! I've just got a new CPU for my PC and installed it and it's working fine but need to update and flash my Phonix BIOS to get the speed up as it only running at 1.2GHZ at the moment and not 2Ghz like it should be!!! Does anyone know a site where I could download some free BIOS software to update my Chip??? My HP PC is currently running Phonix BIOS with not CPU ajustable parameters so need an update that will!!!! Thanks very much in advance!!! :bow:

Many Congratulations to both of you Karl!!!! Hope everyone is doing well!! :bow: :bow: :bow:

Good Work Neil!!!! Looks like Glass with that shine!!! :hyper:

Unless your're down in Conrwall Dave where that isn't so much of a problem!!! As you know not as many Speed Cameras or Traffic cops down here!!! (Probably spoken too soon and I'll get busted today for saying that now! :mac1:)

Many Happy Returns Mate, hope you have a good one!!! :duffer: :duffer: :duffer: :duffer:

Nice on Pete, well done!!! And Mrs Shrimp too!!! Here we go again!!! :) :bow:

Nice one David, Good and very interesting read that!!! :bow:

:rof: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: Ok Vinz, your move!!!