A man goes to a fancy dress party dressed only in his Y-fronts. A woman comes up to him and says "What are you supposed to be?"

The man says "A premature ejaculation."

"What?" says the woman.

The man explains "I've just come in my pants."

 

 

Two cows standing next to each other in a field,

Daisy says to Dolly "I was artificially inseminated this morning."

"I don't believe you," said Dolly.

"It's true, straight up, no bull!"

 

 

A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only cling film for shorts.

The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."

 

 

Answer phone message "....If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key...."

 

 

Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bullshit before

 

My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. He was pulled in by a strong currant.

 

 

A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted,"Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied,"I know you can't, I had to amputate your arms"

 

 

Mrs dunk300zxtt(Wendy)

 

A man goes to a fancy dress party naked except for his dick is inside a milk bottle. A woman comes up to him and says "What are you supposed to be?"

The man says "A fire alarm."

"What?" says the woman.

The man explains "In case of emergency, break glass, pull twice and I'll come as quickly as I can!"

A man turns up at a fancy dress party, naked, with a naked girl on his back. A woman says to him "what are you supposed to be then?".

"I've come as a snail" replies the man.

"So why do you have a naked girl on your back then?" asks the woman.

"That's Michelle"

 

 

A man turns up at a fancy dress party, naked, with a naked girl on his back. A woman says to him "what are you supposed to be then?".

"I've come as a snail" replies the man.

"So why do you have a naked girl on your back then?" asks the woman.

"That's Michelle"

 

 

lol to all!!!!!

 

Q: whats brown & sticky??

A: a stick

A man was rushed to hospital whilst eating in an indian restraunt.

 

He just slipped into a kurma.

Bwahahahah

Paul

 

------------------

A man calls for a vet to see about his poorly Rotweiler.

 

The vet lifts him up, checks his ear, eyes, etc. etc. and says..'There's nothing wrong with him, but I'm going to have to put him down'

 

Guy says 'But why ?!!'

 

Vet: ''Cause he's heavy !'

What is a womans arsehole do when she is having an orgasm?

 

 

he is down the pup with his mates!

Have you herd about the new viagra eydrops?

 

they make you look hard!

WHATS THE AREA OF SKIN CALLED BETWEEN A WOMANS ARSHOLE AND C**T CALLED?

 

------------------

A twernt

 

 

cos if it twernt there her guts ud fall out!!!

 

 

LUKE DUKESTER

 

 

 

------------------

WRONG LUKE,ITS CALLED A TAINTER.WHY BECAUSE IT ,TAINTER **** AND TAINTER ****.

 

------------------

its called the perineum

 

:O)

 

Mike

What's the difference between Light and Hard ?

 

You can sleep with a light on !

 

 

Mike

Are U taking the episiotomy?