LMFAO

 

In response to Section B Q.1 I passed with flying colours...

 

 

...that was me back in me Navy days showing the lads how to really impress the chicks!!! LMFAO

 

 

 

------------------

on the subject of woman, (one of my favourite subjects), a friend of mine e-mailed this. I'm sure you'll find this amusing.....

 

FW: 1943 Guide to Hiring Women.....

 

1943 Guide to Hiring Women

The following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation Magazine. This was serious and written for male supervisors of women in the work force during World War II - a mere 58 years ago! Obviously, the

intent was not to be "funny," but by today's standards, this is hilarious! For those of you with efficiency issues, pay attention to #8.

 

Eleven Tips on Getting More Efficiency Out of Women Employees:

There is no longer any question whether transit companies should hire women for jobs formerly held by men. The draft and manpower shortage has settled that point. The important things now are to select the most efficient women available and how to use them to the best advantage.

 

Here are eleven helpful tips on the subject:

 

1. Pick young married women. They usually have more of a sense of responsibility than their unmarried sisters. They are less likely to be flirtatious. They need the work, or they would not be doing it. They still have the pep and interest to work hard and to deal with the public efficiently.

 

2. When you have to use older women, try to get ones who have worked outside the home at some time in their lives. Older women who have never contacted the public have a hard time adapting themselves and are inclined

to be cantankerous and fussy. It is always well to impress upon older women, the importance of friendliness and courtesy.

 

3. General experience indicates that "husky" girls - those who are just

a little on the heavy side - are more even tempered and efficient than their

underweight sisters.

 

4. Retain a physician to give each woman you hire a special physical

examination - one covering female conditions. This step not only protects

the property against the possibilities of lawsuit, but reveals whether the

employee-to-be has any female weaknesses which would make her mentally or

physically unfit for the job.

 

5. Stress at the outset, the importance of time; the fact that a minute or two lost here and there makes serious inroads on schedules. Until this point is gotten across, service is likely to be slowed up.

 

6. Give the female employee a definite day long schedule of duties so that they will keep busy without bothering the management for instructions every few minutes. Numerous properties say that women make excellent workers when they have their jobs cut out for them, but that they lack initiative in

finding work themselves.

 

7. Whenever possible, let the inside employee change from one job to

another at some time during the day. Women are inclined to be less nervous

and happier with change.

 

8. Give every girl an adequate number of rest periods during the day. You have to make some allowances for feminine psychology. A girl has more

confidence and is more efficient if she can keep her hair tidied, apply fresh lipstick and wash her hands several times a day.

 

9. Be tactful when issuing instructions or in making criticisms. Women are

often sensitive; they cannot shrug off harsh words the way men do. Never ridicule a woman - it breaks her spirit and cuts off her efficiency.

 

10. Be reasonably considerate about using strong language around women.

Even though a girl's husband or father may swear vociferously, she will grow to dislike a place of business where she hears too much of this.

 

11. Get enough size variety in operator's uniforms so that each girl can

have a proper fit. This point cannot be stressed too much in keeping women happy.

 

 

 

A bloke brought a book into work and it was a marrige manual for women from around that time, it was hillarious, one bit said..

 

"when your husband returns from work don't approach him with trivial issues right away. He may have had a tiresome or stressful day, give him time to unwind and relax first."

 

Bwahahahahahah... they dont make women like they used to. The old blokes at work get looked after a lot better than I do.

Paul

I say Mr Chumley Warner, that is absolutely spot on. What? What?

 

 

LMFAO

 

 

RCD

Paulg,

That was from here :-

 

The Good Wives Guide

 

[This is an exact excerpt from a 1950's Home Economics Textbook]

 

Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favorite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

 

Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

 

Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.

 

Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper, etc. and then run a dustcloth over the tables.

 

Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

 

Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair, and if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.

 

Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

 

Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

 

Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first -- remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

 

Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead try to understand his world of strain and pressure, and his very real need to be at home and relax.

 

Your goal. Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquillity where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

 

Don't greet him with complaints and problems.

 

Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.

 

Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

 

Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low soothing and pleasant voice.

 

Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him. A good wife always knows her place.

 

Anyway, nothing wrong with a wife, everyone should have one, finding a good one is the tricky bit !