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indian_zx

Dormant Member
  • Joined

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  • Country

    United Kingdom

Everything posted by indian_zx

  1. no im not asking for a dodgy one, it was the new mot certificate.
  2. i have lost my m.o.t. cert last owner had the mot done and i cant get hold of him. where can i get a replacement, i dont want to fork out 45 pounds.
  3. A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The sign reads: "If you can catch me, you can have me." Without a second thought, he takes off after her. A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her. The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens. On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lb As promised. He then calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life. She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads: "If you catch me you can have me." Well, he's out the door after her like a shot! This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her; but when he does, it's definitely worth every muscle cramp and wheeze, so for the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover that he has lost another 20 lb. as promised. He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program. "Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone, "This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies," I haven't felt this good in years." The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds this huge, muscular, 7 ft man standing there, wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that read: "I'm Dave. If I catch you, you're mine!"
  4. Christmas Story for people having a bad day.... When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where. More stress. Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys. So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider pot, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom. Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa trudged to the door. He opened the door, and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?" And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree!
  5. Wives Night Out Two women friends had gone for a girl's night out; both were very faithful and loving wives, however, they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers. Incredibly drunk & walking home they needed to take a pee so they stopped in the cemetery. One of them had nothing to wipe with so She thought she would take off her panties and use them. Her friend However was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to Ruin them, but was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had A wreath with ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that. After the girls did their business they proceeded to go home. The next day one of the women's husbands was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said, "These damn girly nights have Got to stop. I'm starting to suspect the worst. My wife came home with No panties! I'm going to kill the son of a b#tch!" "That's nothing" said the other husband, "Mine came back with a Card stuck between her a#se that said "From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll never forget you."
  6. GLAD YOU AND YOU loved ones are ok if you have a look at my crash it looks sooo similar. hope you all get well soon.
  7. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3iRzNTxXOqI
  8. this has got to be a fcking joke i hope
  9. i dont but do you like it? http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/1993-VAUXHALL-CALIBRA-ORANGE-BLACK_W0QQitemZ200055939224QQihZ010QQcategoryZ9858QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem
  10. peeps do you remember mr bean?? well his new film his out next month. im going to buy all his episodes on ebay and watch it through christmas
  11. she gave 400 pounds for my birthday 3 months ago :)
  12. lol its actualy for my girlfriend
  13. http://www1.euro.dell.com/content/products/features.aspx/dimen_e520?c=uk&cs=ukdhs1&l=en&s=dhs the one in the middle with speakers and a subwoofers and upgraded graphics card delivery and all software for 550
  14. i was looking at the middle one for gaming entertainement and internet
  15. http://www1.euro.dell.com/content/products/features.aspx/dimen_e520?c=uk&cs=ukdhs1&l=en&s=dhs
  16. this is for someone on their birthday and christmas present. i saw this p.c. in comet is it any good? http://www.comet.co.uk/cometbrowse/product.do?sku=365556 Processor speed: 2.2 GHz Processor: AMD Athlon 64 x2 Optical drive: Plays & records CDs and DVDs Storage (hard drive): 250 GB Memory (RAM): 1024 MB £499.99 £499.99 i also need a dvd player with a slim t.v. any body have any links??
  17. IWANT ONE OF THOSE. COM were doing the same at work and im getting a girl the workouts dolls.

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