just had a convo with a mate (girl) on MSN

 

got round to cars.

 

"whats a VEYRON"

 

:slap:

whoops :rofl: :headvswal

just had a convo with a mate (girl) on MSN

 

got round to cars.

 

"whats a VEYRON"

 

:slap:

 

a new make of lipstick??? :p :p

My other halfs car has got an automatic headlights on function. She asked "why would you need that". I replied to put the lights on automatically. She says "well when would they come on?". I say "what do you think would be a good time for them to come on". She replies "I don't know.....................ABOUT 6 O'Clock!!!".

 

I very nearly pissed myself!!.

My other halfs car has got an automatic headlights on function. She asked "why would you need that". I replied to put the lights on automatically. She says "well when would they come on?". I say "what do you think would be a good time for them to come on". She replies "I don't know.....................ABOUT 6 O'Clock!!!".

 

I very nearly pissed myself!!.

:rofl: :rofl: oh dear

My other halfs car has got an automatic headlights on function. She asked "why would you need that". I replied to put the lights on automatically. She says "well when would they come on?". I say "what do you think would be a good time for them to come on". She replies "I don't know.....................ABOUT 6 O'Clock!!!".

 

I very nearly pissed myself!!.

 

 

What time will they come on then? :rofl: :rofl:

you should of said twilight oclock

My other halfs car has got an automatic headlights on function. She asked "why would you need that". I replied to put the lights on automatically. She says "well when would they come on?". I say "what do you think would be a good time for them to come on". She replies "I don't know.....................ABOUT 6 O'Clock!!!".

 

I very nearly pissed myself!!.

*****cks! I've gotta wipe off the coffee i've just spat all over my

keyboard!

:rofl:

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

My missus is blond but I’m saying nothing, I don’t suit black eyes.

Snake in grass that I am, I felt compelled to share the fact that my best mate's ex-missus once asked me if it "cost much to heat the car?"... God bless her one in a long line of classics from her. Happy days. :p

 

(Brunette, btw - what does that say?)

 

CheerZ,

JB.

how much does it cost to heat the car bwahahahahaha classic!!

 

and im chuffing blonde!!

Gave a girl at my work a rather large piece of magnet.......... she asked what it was, so I told her, it's just a magnet!

She then proceeded to hit it off the (wooden) desk saying, "no it's not!!! it ain't stickin'!"

 

took me about 5 minutes to recover......... she didn't even catch on, she was asking what I was laughin at.

 

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

now there's true blondes and airplane blondes ..............................an airplane blonde has a black box :) we did see a fat bloke with "guess" on his t shirt and the girl i was with (airplane blonde) said to me .........."thyroid problem" ?

 

i nearly pissed myself

:rofl: :rofl:

 

Another one of her classics. We were in a restaurant and my mates missus asked if we should get the MerloT wine (pronouncing the T). I leaned over and quietly said "you don't pronounce the T". She said "what do you mean?" My missus chirps in with "it's silent, you don't say it, you know, like.....................CALAIS!"

 

New strides please !! :rofl: :rofl:

another one for you.

 

BLONDES ARE SMARTER THAN LAWYERS

 

A lawyer and a blonde woman are sitting next to each other on a long

flight. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde is

tired and just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and tries to

catch a few winks.

 

The lawyer persists, that the game is a lot of fun. "I ask you a question,

and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5; you ask me one, and

if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500."

 

This catches the blonde's attention; and, to keep him quiet, she agrees to

play the game. The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance

from the earth to the moon?" The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches in to

her purse, pulls out a five-dollar

bill, and hands it to the lawyer.

 

Now, it's the blonde's turn. She asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill

with three legs, and comes down with four?" The lawyer uses his laptop,

searches all references. He uses the Airphone; he searches the Net and even

the Library of Congress. He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows,

all to no avail.

 

After one hour of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the blonde

and hands her $500. The blonde takes the $500 and goes back to sleep.

 

The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes her up and asks,

"Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?"

 

The blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to

sleep.

irish man and the blond

 

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irishman is sitting at a bar having a pint when a blond woman walks in and sits next to him.

 

she has obviously had a few bottles of 'tart fuel' and strikes up a conversation.

 

she notices his footwear is strange and asks 'why do you have L and R on your shoes?' he replies, i'm a bit tick you see, its to help me figure right foot and left foot !

 

'oh replies the blond!!! thats why my nickers have C&A on the label then'

got another but cant find it. lol

irish man and the blond

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

irishman is sitting at a bar having a pint when a blond woman walks in and sits next to him.

 

she has obviously had a few bottles of 'tart fuel' and strikes up a conversation.

 

she notices his footwear is strange and asks 'why do you have L and R on your shoes?' he replies, i'm a bit tick you see, its to help me figure right foot and left foot !

 

'oh replies the blond!!! thats why my nickers have C&A on the label then'

 

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

A blonde is sat in a cafe with her friend and she is reading the paper. Suddenly she bursts into tears and her friend asks her what is wrong. She replies that there have been two Brazillian soldiers killed in a bomb blast in Rio. Her friend asks her why this has upset her so much.

 

She replies "WELL HOW MANY IS TWO BRAZILLIAN!!.