An airplane was about to crash; there were 5 passengers on board but only 4 parachutes. The first passenger said, " I'm Kobe Bryant, the best NBA basketball player, the Lakers need me, I can't afford to die....So he took the first parachute and left the plane.

> >

The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, said, "I am the wife of the former president of the United States, I am also the most ambitious woman in the world and I am a New York Senator and a potential future president."

She took the second parachute and jumped out of theplane.

> >

The third passenger, George W. Bush, said: "I'm President of the United States of America, I have a great responsibility being the leader of a superpower nation. And above all I'm the cleverest President in American history, so America's people won't let me die." So he put on the pack next to him and jumped out of the plane.

> >

The fourth passenger, the Pope, says to the fifth passenger, a 10 year-old school boy, "I am old and frail and I don't have many years left, as a Catholic I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute.

The boy said, "It's OK, there's a parachute left for you. America's cleverest President has taken my schoolbag.

 

Leigh

ROFLMFFFAAAAAAOOOOOO

 

Diamond!

 

 

 

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"If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land

on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of

a cat and drop it?"

Steven Wright.

Another Giggle.

 

Some years ago, a sultan who had six children, all girls, began to despair

as he had no son and heir.

Imagine his joy when one of his wives finally

presented him with a son and heir.

 

Just before his son's sixth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side and said, "Son, I am very proud of you. Anything you want, I shall get

for you."

 

His son replied, "Daddy, I would like to have my own airplane."

Not wanting to do anything by halves, his father bought him American Airlines.

 

Just before his son's seventh birthday, the Sultan took him to one side.

 

"Son, you are my pride and joy. Anything you want, I shall get for you."

 

His son replied, "Daddy, I would like a boat."

Not wanting to do anything halfway, his father bought him The

Princess Cruise Lines.

 

Just before his son's eighth birthday, the Sultan took him to one side.

 

"Son, you bring so much happiness into my life. Anything you want, I shall get for you."

His son replied, "Daddy, I would like to be able to watch cartoons."

 

Not wanting to look a cheapskate, his father bought him Disney Studios and their theatres, where he watched all his favourite cartoons.

 

Just before his son's ninth birthday, the Sultan took him to one

side.

"Son, you are an inspiration to us all. Anything you want, I shall get for you."

 

His son, who was by now really into the Disney cartoons, replied,

 

"Daddy, I would like a Mickey Mouse outfit."

Not wanting to appear to be tight, his father bought him Chelsea football club !

 

 

 

LMAO!!!

 

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lol

Excellent.

 

And again, LMAO