Me and my girlfriend of 7.5 years have decided to take a break so I can work out what I want.

 

I have been getting restless and even though I know she is one in a million I just don't fancy her as much any more. :cry:

 

I know this sounds selfish but I don't think I can be happy settling down with one person for the rest of my life without having sown my wild oats.

 

I'm in a right pickle... :cry: :cry: :cry:

Lol, sounds like the 7.5yr itch to me! Go out travel the world and sh*g loads of Thai whores until it itches even more, then come back to domestic bliss (but don't tell her!).

yep sounds like the seven year itch - still looks like you care about her - you're going to feel a bit gutted if you go and sow your wild oats and then realise that the grass isnt always greener on the other side.

 

relationships change and they aint always going to be hot and intense - my advice - see if you can re-kindle that little something you've lost and appreciate what you've got .

 

good luck bud with whichever way you go.

 

regards,

 

 

alex

Yeah, I shouldn't be so flippant. You know she's one in a million so its a big thing to throw away seven and a half years of relationship development. We've been together about 5yrs now I think, and I've had moments when things have been rough and I felt like packing it all in but I'm glad I didn't. Woman are only interested when they can't have me anyhow!

Why don't you have a chat and get a bit kinky or something (!) and try to rekindle the lust? That always seems the problem to me. Blokes want filth and women want meaningful conversations and romance :)

Your just going through what 99% of couples go through, you've just got used to her, it may not be that you dont fancy her anymore, it maybe that you know everything about her, so the excitment has gone as there isnt anything new to learn about her, like there is when you meet someone new. Time to spice things up a bit, get some excitment back into the relationship, (try and get her and 1 of her mates in bed together with you lol)

 

Ask yourself how you would feel if she went off shagging someone else, would it hurt you or not? That will give you the answer to what direction you take.

i bet you havemates without girlfriends that go out on te pull all the time, i feel like that somtime's but i always give myself a shake and relise what i have, dont spend so much time together, when we go out 9 times out of ten we go out seperate and meet up later for taxi home

 

hang in there bud, the feling dont last long

the grass is NOT always greener and you dont want to lose what is the love of your life for a cheap time with some meaningless slappers. The tables could turn and she could meet someone else and your left wondering why you quite possibly made the worst mistake of your life!!

 

if that makes any sense

yep sounds like the seven year itch - still looks like you care about her - you're going to feel a bit gutted if you go and sow your wild oats and then realise that the grass isnt always greener on the other side.

 

relationships change and they aint always going to be hot and intense - my advice - see if you can re-kindle that little something you've lost and appreciate what you've got .

 

good luck bud with whichever way you go.

 

regards,

 

 

alex

 

What he said........

 

......and my final piece of advice - make sure she doesn't log on here and read this thread!! ;)

 

Richard :cool:

Thanks for all the advice guys (and Sarah),

 

You are all right, it is a 7 year itch. The only reason it all came out in the open is that I have been bottling it up for about 12 months.

It feels good to get it off my chest even if it does hurt a lot.

 

I think I am going to take a week or so and just mull it all over, talk to my friends and family and see how I feel.

 

Thanks again...

If you feel like its not right then get out and nail anything you can, Life is not a dress rehersal and your a long time dead. Don't go get married because you feel sorry for someone, or because you think its the thing to do. If You don't realy want to be with her then get your ass out of there.

 

If you think you anf her are right for each other then you wouldn't be taking time out. Make it perminent and get back in the saddle. You will know when it's right because you wo't be asking uk lot for advice as to wether or not to stay.

you never know what you have until you have lost it...........dont play with it.

cherish it , listen to your heart not your knob .........if she is one in a million , hang on tight to it , sowing wild oats is not everything , ...Trust Respect and Honour and start dating her again , ..........peoples emotions change as they get comfortable with each other its perfectly natural and how relationships develop and evolve ....change with it and above all else communicate openly with each other and maybe there is something really simple that you both need to put things back on track ...........its too late for me ........im going through hell with my wife who wants to split up after 14 years.....but i wish to christ i could turn back the clock i miss her so much dont take each other for granted ........

you never know what you have until you have lost it...........dont play with it.

cherish it , listen to your heart not your knob .........if she is one in a million , hang on tight to it , sowing wild oats is not everything , ...Trust Respect and Honour and start dating her again , ..........peoples emotions change as they get comfortable with each other its perfectly natural and how relationships develop and evolve ....change with it and above all else communicate openly with each other and maybe there is something really simple that you both need to put things back on track ...........its too late for me ........im going through hell with my wife who wants to split up after 14 years.....but i wish to christ i could turn back the clock i miss her so much dont take each other for granted ........

I appreciate where you are coming from and the advice.

 

I am pretty sure I want to be with her, but I need to be completely sure and now that this is all out in the open if I didn't take some time out to think it all through I think I will come to regret it.

 

Breaking up is so very hard to do...

Don't take this the wrong way BUT:

 

If you love her and you want to be with her and it's upsetting you to leave her but you're going to leave her in case you're missing out on something better:

 

You're an idiot :(

I have to be honest matey, if you've been with her for 7.5 years you've either:

 

- been with her because it's easier than starting all over again

 

OR

 

- there's a reason

 

I was with someone for 4 years and it just fell apart and i never once thought of marraige

 

I've met the girl i want to spend the rest of my life with and things have moved alot quicker than any other relationship i've ever been in but it feels right.

 

You have to ask yourself if she is the one then why haven't you done anything sooner BUT then again my priorities have changed over the past twelve months and i've wanted to settle down.

 

Every bloke wants to sow his oats, it's nature. Man has had many partners at once - just look at the animal world; so that is never going to change

 

BUT

 

if you love her, you ache when you're apart and don't feel complete, proper love then she must be the one.

 

Only you know that. You have to try and see a future with or without her and take the best option that suits you.

 

Although my situation isn't easy at the moment i've stuck with her through thick and thin and i know it'll be worth it in the long run.

 

Take a break with her, make an effort to get that magic back and hopefully it should work out.

 

Bets of luck buddy

Don't take this the wrong way BUT:

 

If you love her and you want to be with her and it's upsetting you to leave her but you're going to leave her in case you're missing out on something better:

 

You're an idiot :(

I didn't take it the wrong way, I think I probably am an idiot!

 

But I need to be SURE.

 

If I go back to her now I will spend the rest of my time with her wondering "what if"

 

Nick- thanks for the comments, hopefully see you soon...

Good luck :)

either way you go ,i wish you good luck mate ....your right you need to be sure, its a big step to take ........hope it all works out for you both .

 

Steve