OK guys n gals, have a giggle -

 

("mutant fish" snarf snarf snarf )

 

What Your Car Says About You

 

Audi 90: I enjoy putting out engine fires

BMW 3-series: I wish I were important

BMW 5-series: I'm not important, but at least I got a raise

BMW 7-series: I'm still not important, but I've perfected the art of living beyond my means

Buick Riviera: I like to make a statement by driving an ugly car, and the Toyota Supra is too small

Buick Park Avenue: I am older than 34 of the 50 states

Cadillac Seville: I am a pimp

Chevrolet Camaro: I enjoy beating the hell out of people

Chevrolet Chevette: I like people's reactions when I tell them I have a 'vette

Chevrolet Corvette: I'm in a mid-life crisis

Dodge Stealth: I'm having a mid-life crisis, but I couldn't afford a Corvette

Ford Explorer: It IS NOT a station wagon . . . it's a sport-ute

Ford Mustang: I slow down to 85 in school zones

Ford Crown Victoria: I enjoy having people slow to 55 mph and change lanes when I pull up behind them

Honda Accord: I lack any originality and am basically a lemming

Honda Civic: I have just graduated and have no credit

Honda Integra: I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars

Honda Legend: I'm too bland for German cars

Honda NSX: I am impotent

Isuzu Impulse: I do not give a damn about J.D. Power or his reports

Jaguar XJ6: I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year

Jeep Cherokee: It is NOT a yuppie station wagon

Lexus 300/400: I'm a contra-snob: I don't mind spending $50,000 on a car with a $20,000 design

Mercedes SLK Convertible: Why yes, my name is Buffy... how did you know?

Mercedes 500SEL: I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph

Mercedes 560SEL: I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole

Mazda Miata: I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler

MGB: I am dating a mechanic

Nissan 280Z: I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well

Nissan 300ZX: I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings

Nissan Maxima: My 3rd wife made me sell the 300ZX

Nissan Sentra GLE: The JokeMaster talked me into it

Oldsmobile Cutlass: I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts

Peugeot 505 Diesel: I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List

Plymouth Neon: I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena

Pontiac Trans Am: I have a switchblade in my sock

Porsche 911 Turbo: I am a bad-ass MOFO and like big breasted women.

Porsche 944: I am dating big-breasted women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me

Subaru Legacy: I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than the Isuzu

Toyota Camry: I am in the closet

Toyota Supra: I like driving a car that looks like a mutant fish

Volkswagen Beetle: I still watch Partridge Family reruns

Volkswagen Golf Cabriolet: I am out of the closet

Volkswagen Microbus: I have been tripping continuously since 1968

Volvo 740 Wagon: I am frightened of my wife

 

Let's have some UK additions....

 

------------------

Most cars out there - I don't go at any speed other than 40mph and don't look when pulling out, but somehow I still have a clean license and clean history

 

CheerZ,

 

Andy

 

------------------