F1 CHICKEN

 

Why did the chicken cross the road?

We asked this traditional question to a whole load of Formula 1

personalities. As you'd expect from grand prix drivers and team managers,

the answers were quite varied...

 

Mika Hakkinen (McLaren)

"Why did the chicken cross the road?" (pause) "that's tough

question" (pause) "maybe" (pause) "maybe it's a question you have to

ask

the chicken."

 

David Coulthard (McLaren)

"I was really surprised when the chicken swerved right in front of

me and crossed the road. I was expecting it to walk straight along the

pavement, but it just cut right across in front of me. I think we'll need

a ruling from the FIA if chickens are allowed to do this."

 

Michael Schumacher

"The chicken is allowed to move over, that is clearly within the

rules. The chicken can make one move to defend his line. But it can't

zig-zag backwards and forwards across the road. What it did was quite fair

and within the rules."

 

Rubens Barrichello (Ferrari)

"I'd like to dedicate the chicken crossing the road to my great

friend Ayrton Senna"

 

Luca Montezemolo (Ferrari)

"The chicken knew that it couldn't get to the other side of the

road first, it had to wait for the rooster and let it through."

 

Ron Dennis (McLaren)

"The objective of the poultry individual in this situation is to

work towards the goal of a road crossing. We're comfortable that that can

be achieved using only bi-ped motional forces. We would refuse to

compromise until a safe chicken arrival scenario had been achieved."

 

Alain Prost (Prost ACER)

"For sure the chicken crossed the road. But for me it was not as

interesting as chickens crossing the road ten years ago."

 

Max Mosley (FIA president)

"We have to find ways of slowing that chicken down and making them

safer. For that reason the FIA are changing the rules so that chickens

crossing roads will be equipped with special chicken bodywork and neck

supports."

 

Jacques Villeneuve (BAR Honda)

"So what the f*** if the chicken gets run over. The chicken

wanted to cross the road."

 

James Allen (ITV pitlane reporter)

"Hey guys, you're not going to believe this, but the chicken's on

a different strategy to the bantams."

 

Murray Walker and Martin Brundle (ITV commentators)

Murray: And as the lights go out, it's GO GO GO for the duck as it

dives towards...

Martin: It's a chicken Murray.

Murray: Yes, yes, it's a chicken, charging into the lead. I think

it's got this race sewn up.

Martin: The chicken's stopped, Murray

Murray: DISASTER for the chicken! This will throw the whole

badger crossing championship wide open ...

 

Eddie Irvine (Jaguar)

"There's this real hot chick on the other side. Of course it

wants to cross!"

 

Frank Williams (Team Williams)

"The chicken may have been first across the road but we'll still

be looking for a new chicken for next year."

 

TRUE TRUE LOL that is exaclty ehat they would say.

MONTOYA : The fucking chicken has already killed an egg this year"

" lol

 

------------------

That's good, I like that!

 

 

Tim

;-)

 

V funny!

Sorry everyone, but I couldn't help myself....

Here is a nice list of Murray-isms......

 

"And now excuse me while I interrupt myself..."

 

"Either the car is stationary or it's on the move."

 

"Tambay's hopes, which were previously nil, are now absolutely zero."

 

"I've just stopped my startwatch."

 

"That was exactly the same place where Senna overtook Nannini that he didn't overtake Alain Prost."

 

"A mediocre season for Nelson Piquet, as he is now known, and always has been."

 

"Martin Schanche's car is absolutely unique except for the one behind, which is identical."

 

"Two laps to go, then the action will begin. Unless this is the action, which it is."

 

"The young Ralf Schumacher has been upstaged by the teenager Jenson Button, who is 20."

 

"It's a sad ending albeit a happy one here at Montreal for today's grand prix."

 

"The first four cars are both on the same tyres."

 

"Unless I'm very much mistaken... yes, I AM very much mistaken."

 

"There's nothing wrong with the car except it's on fire."

 

"With the race half gone there is half the race still to go."

 

"I imagine the conditions in those cars are totally unimaginable."

 

"The atmosphere is so tense you could cut it with a cricket stump."

 

"Prost can see Mansell in his earphones."

 

"Either that car is stationary or it is on the move."

 

"And now the boot is on the other Schumacher."

 

"Do my eyes deceive me or is Senna's car sounding a bit rough?"

 

"Damon Hill is leading. Behind him are the second and third men."

 

"There's only a second between them. One. Thats how long a second is."

 

"There is no doubt in my mind that if the race had been 46 laps instead of 45 it would have been a McLaren first and second. But it didn't so it wasn't."

 

"And it's Mansell, Mansell, Mansell... Nigel Mansell." [it was actually Alain Prost]

 

"He's obviously gone in for a wheel change. I say obviously because I can't see it."

 

"Anything happens in grand prix racing and it usually does."

 

"Alboreto has dropped back up to fifth place."

 

"He is shedding buckets of adrenaline in that car."

 

Murray: "What's that? There's a body on the track!"

James Hunt: "Um, I think that that is a piece of bodywork from

someone's car."

 

Murray: "There's a fiery glow coming from the back of the Ferrari."

James Hunt: "No Murray, that's his rear safety light."

 

"And the first five places are filled by five different cars."

 

"You can't see a digital clock because there isn't one."

 

"And we've had five races so far this year - Brazil, Argentina, Imola, Schumacher and Monaco."

 

"And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the Williams pit and Damon Hill is in the pit, no it's Michael Schumacher."

 

"As you look at the first four, the significant thing is that Alboreto is fifth."

 

"I can't imagine what kind of problem Senna. I imagine it must be some sort of grip problem."

 

"And this is the third placed car about to lap the second placed car."

 

Murray: "So Bernie, in the seventeen years since you bought McLaren, which of your many achievements do you think was the most memorable?"

Bernie Ecclestone: "Well I don't remember buying McLaren."

 

"Andrea de Cesaris... The man who has won more grand prix than anyone else without actually winning one of them."

 

We'll miss ya Murray, Gawd Bless!

 

 

Tim

;-)

 

IT IS TRULY GOING TO BE A SAD DAY WHEN HE RETIRES, CAUSE F1 IS NOT THE SAME WITHOUT HIM

Damn right it won'tbe the same. We'll be able to tell WTF is going on without him

 

Seriously though, I will miss him. His enthusiasm adds a lot.

 

Andy

Still laughing.

Nice One!!!

 

Glen