Does anyone else turn into a greeneyed monster when it comes to their husbands/wives/partners???

 

Found out yesterday by accident my husband has a gym buddy!!!!!!!!

 

To say I'm not best pleased is an understatement and I'm the first to admit I'm a jealous biatch!! Just want to know would anyone else turn into the green eyed monster or is it just me over reacting????

Hmmm, tricky one. First off is this buddy male or female?

i couldnt give a damm tbh. as long as there having fun :lol:

Female!!!!

 

She's a so called friend of us both and they've been gym buddies for 2 months and I only found out because of a message on his phone!!

have you been spying??

Ask him about it and see what he says. Do you have any reason to doubt him? You have to have trust in a relationship.

if you trust him it shouldn't make any different if the friend/buddy is female or male ...

 

it doesnt bother me with my wife as shes got male friends ... my wife knows i have female ones too

No I haven't lol. I just saw a message on the hubbys phone which he was quick to snatch away from me I might add and it said about them meeting at the gym so he then had to admit that they've been going to the gym together for 2 months but didn't want to tell me to save my feelings and he knew I'd react!

thats wrong ... as it makes it worse than it is ... or something out of nothing ... if u know what i mean ...

 

it was wrong of him not to say regardless ....

I would proberly do the same tbh if i was him. I know becks would get suspisious..

 

Its hard for us to say dont worry about it now you already have doubts in your head :(

If you are comfortable in your relationship and trust each other, i wouldnt let it eat you up and cause tension between yourselves over something that might never or isnt going on.

I would ask your husband as tactfully as possible and tell him your concerns, but dont jump down his throat or start an argument. You will get far more out of a man by talking calmly about it rather than confrontational.

thats wrong ... as it makes it worse than it is ... or something out of nothing ... if u know what i mean ...

 

it was wrong of him not to say regardless ....

 

Oh yeah ive met this women down at the gym and now were gym bubbys. do you mind :lol:

 

I dont think so lol!!

I do trust him but why lie? Why hide it for 2 months and then tell me to get over it!!

 

He knows I'm jealous and insecure so surely if you know this about someone you wouldn't make them feel it even more you would reassure them, wouldn't you????

probably best talking to him.or shouting. needs clearing up though. i do the same sometimes(don't tell her things to try prevent bad reactions) always f**ks up though.

We've done the talking (me screaming/crying/swearing) and as far as it goes nothing is going to change he is still going to go gym with this bird! And I've got to put up and shut up or call it quits!!!

 

I don't want my marriage to end so I've got to put up with it whilst trying to get over the fact my husband has lied to me and hid things from me!

 

I'm coming back as a bloke when I die!!!!!!

you will work though it and i'm sure the marrige is worth it

 

Mark

i couldnt give a damm tbh. as long as there having fun :lol:

 

Whilst Dave's comment is in line with his usual style and humour - I can see sense in that!!

 

Nicci, I would not be jealous unless you had any definite clues that you should be. I have been happily married for 12 years this June and in that time, Julia has had no problems with my best friend (of 26 years) being female; albeit we hardly meet up so much nowadays. Also I have a very good relationship with my assistant at work; we go out to lunch together once a week and I always bring her back a small present when I go on holiday (in fact Julia helps chose the gift!).

 

OK so Julia has no male friends nowadays, but if she did I'd be fine with it - we are both secure and confident in our relationship not to be worried about a platonic friendship one or other of us might have. If anything I reckon it strenghthens our relationship....

 

Whilst men are superficial creatures and, if they have female friends will undoubtedly find said friends attractive (else why would we have made friends with them in the first place), sub-consiously fancy the ladies in question; we would never actually do anything to consumate that friendship. For starters, we know what's best for us and that is definitely our wife/partner etc; secondly you have to remember that said females might not actually fancy us!! I hear that women can actually be friends with a man and not be sexually attracted them.......

 

Richard:winkiss:

Whilst Dave's comment is in line with his usual style and humour - I can see sense in that!!

 

Nicci, I would not be jealous unless you had any definite clues that you should be. I have been happily married for 12 years this June and in that time, Julia has had no problems with my best friend (of 26 years) being female; albeit we hardly meet up so much nowadays. Also I have a very good relationship with my assistant at work; we go out to lunch together once a week and I always bring her back a small present when I go on holiday (in fact Julia helps chose the gift!).

 

OK so Julia has no male friends nowadays, but if she did I'd be fine with it - we are both secure and confident in our relationship not to be worried about a platonic friendship one or other of us might have. If anything I reckon it strenghthens our relationship....

 

Whilst men are superficial creatures and, if they have female friends will undoubtedly find said friends attractive (else why would we have made friends with them in the first place), sub-consiously fancy the ladies in question; we would never actually do anything to consumate that friendship. For starters, we know what's best for us and that is definitely our wife/partner etc; secondly you have to remember that said females might not actually fancy us!! I hear that women can actually be friends with a man and not be sexually attracted them.......

Richard:winkiss:

 

Very true mate, happens to me all the time :lol:

Whilst Dave's comment is in line with his usual style and humour - I can see sense in that!!

 

I hear that women can actually be friends with a man and not be sexually attracted them.......

 

Richard:winkiss:

 

 

Bloodly hell can you :lol:

 

as for the 2nd part well thats married life isnt it :lol:

Bloodly hell can you :lol:

 

as for the 2nd part well thats married life isnt it :lol:

 

Give a monkey a typewriter and enough time and it will eventually make some sense :lol:

Bloodly hell can you :lol:

 

as for the 2nd part well thats married life isnt it :lol:

 

Ahem...... mental note, move to private forums....LOL

 

Richard:tt2:

:lol::lol:

I know what your saying and yes I think my marriage is worth it hence why he's still here and not back at his parents house! I think its more me being jealous that is the problem how do I get over that??

 

I've worked out that the reason I feel like I do is that he makes me feel WOW!! ( I know pass the bucket) but I can't bare him making someone else feel like that I want that all for myself and he is a bit of a ladies man and just has a way with women, just wanna say thanks to you all for listening to me rant made me feel a lot better!!

I know what your saying and yes I think my marriage is worth it hence why he's still here and not back at his parents house! I think its more me being jealous that is the problem how do I get over that??

 

I've worked out that the reason I feel like I do is that he makes me feel WOW!! ( I know pass the bucket) but I can't bare him making someone else feel like that I want that all for myself and he is a bit of a ladies man and just has a way with women, just wanna say thanks to you all for listening to me rant made me feel a lot better!!

 

Hate to say but jealousy will end a relationship quicker than anything else! It is a horrible feeling and I do understand what you mean about not wanting to share them with anyone, but it will destroy you both and leave you feeling very bitter.

 

Cognitive behavoir therapy (CBT) may help you deal with your feelings in a more rational way.

 

I wish you the best of luck with it.

I know what your saying and yes I think my marriage is worth it hence why he's still here and not back at his parents house! I think its more me being jealous that is the problem how do I get over that??

 

I've worked out that the reason I feel like I do is that he makes me feel WOW!! ( I know pass the bucket) but I can't bare him making someone else feel like that I want that all for myself and he is a bit of a ladies man and just has a way with women, just wanna say thanks to you all for listening to me rant made me feel a lot better!!

 

That is exactly the issue Nicci - how he makes you feel!! Human beings are wonderful creatures and, thankfully, each of us is different. So you might think your hubby has a way with women, but not every other woman will feel the same way. As a woman yourself, how many good looking or charming men have you turned down/knocked back because they simply did not "do it for YOU?"

 

I doubt this "gym buddy" feels the same way about him as you do. I rest my case.......

 

Hate to say but jealousy will end a relationship quicker than anything else! It is a horrible feeling and I do understand what you mean about not wanting to share them with anyone, but it will destroy you both and leave you feeling very bitter.

 

Cognitive behavoir therapy (CBT) may help you deal with your feelings in a more rational way.

 

I wish you the best of luck with it.

 

.....and forget the therapy; an evening spent on 300zx.co.uk can answer all your questions and unlock the secrets of the universe!! Welcome back to the fold hun - we're always here for you!!

 

Richard:sorcerer:

I found therapy tonight its in the shape of a can of beer well several actually lol