In view that our Cyclops leader may be on his way out, here are a few Scottish expressions and words.

 

I have taken the liberty to explain each one after the Scottish list !!

 

By the way, we dont want Gordy back up here any more than you want him down there !

 

Enjoy !!

 

 

 

1.... ye can properly pronounce; McConnochie, Ecclefechan, Milngavie, Sauchiehall, St Enoch,

Auchtermuchty and Aufurfuksake.

 

2. Ye actually like deep fried battered pizza fae the chippie.

 

3. Ye get four seasons in wan day.

 

4. Ye canny pass a chip/kebab shop withoot sleverin when yer blootert.

 

5. Ye kin fall about pished withoot spilling yer drink.

 

6. Ye see people wear shell suits with burberry accessories - pure class!

 

7. Ye measure distance in minutes.

 

8. Ye kin understaun Rab C Nesbitt and know characters just like him, in yer ain family.

 

9. Ye go tae Saltcoats cos ye think it is like gaun tae the ocean.

 

10. Ye kin make hael sentences jist wae sweer wurds.

 

11. Ye know whit haggis is made ae and stull like eating it.

 

12. Somedy ye know his used a fitba schedule tae plan thur wedding day date.

 

13. You've been at a wedding and fitba scores are announced in the Church/Chapel.

 

14. Ye urny surprised tae find curries, pizzas, kebabs, fish n chips, irn-bru, fags and nappies all in the wan shop.

 

15. Yer holiday home at the seaside has calor gas under it.

 

16. A big flash car has a ned at the wheel.

 

17. Ye know irn-bru is a hangover cure.

 

18. Ye learnt tae sweer afore ye learnt tae dae sums.

 

19. Ye actually understand this and yurr gonnae send it tae yer pals .

 

20. Finally, you are 100% Glaswegian if you have ever said/heard these words...

 

how's it hingin

clatty

boggin

cludgie

pished

get it up ye

wee beasties

arse bandit

amurny

away an bile yer heid

peely-wally

humphey backit

Ba'-heid

baw bag

dubble nuggit

 

 

 

In the Queens English !

 

 

1: How to pronounce ? Say as you see.

 

a, McConnochie....Makonakey.

b, Ecclefechan......Ekillfekan.

c, Milngavie..........Mullguy

d Sauchiehall........Sockyhall.

e, St Enoch...........Saint Eenok.

f, Auchtermuchty...Oktermukty.

g, Aufurfuksake..... Oh For Goodness Sake !

 

2: Pizza, dipped in batter and then deep fried.

 

3: The weather can blow a gale, blazing sunshine, pour down with rain,

Blizzard with snow and be minus 10 all within an 8 hour period !! This is true !

 

4: You find it difficult to pass a take-away hot food shop, while under the influence of alcohol.

 

5: While drunk, you can fall over and not spill a drop from your glass, bottle etc.

 

6: Shell suits, Burberry hats, etc Fashionable ? Make your own mind up on this one.

 

7: For example: The bus station is only 10 minutes away.

 

8: Their is a member, or members of your immediate family, that behave like the comedy character, Rab C Nesbitt, and you agree with his philosphies.

 

9: Saltcoats is a quant fishing village by the sea.

 

10: You can make a whole sentence using only swear words of one form or another.

Obviously the use of pronouns and incorrect adverbs are acceptable !

 

11: You know what is in a haggis, and still eat it !!!

 

12: Your wedding date is planned well in advance, so it doesnt coincide with an important football fixture. ie the Old Firm Derby.

 

13: While at a wedding that was incorrectly planned, the main football scores will be read out in church, chapel etc. Usually an Old Firm Derby. see above.

 

14: Your local corner shop should sell all of lifes essentials. ie Hot food, cold drinks, alcohol,

tobacco, Pampers etc

 

15: Holiday home is a caravan.

 

16: Stolen car or driven by a drug dealer.

 

17: Soft drink called "IRN-BRU" is the best thing for drinking the morning after a big night on the tiles.

 

18: You could use expletives before you could use basic arithmetic.

 

19: You understand all of the above and find it amusing enough to forward on to your friends.

 

29: Most folks from Glasgow have used at least 2 of these words today.

 

a. How`s it hingin ?................How are you doing ?

b. Clatty................................Dirty, unclean.

c. Boggin...............................Really dirty, very unclean.

d. Cludgie..............................W.C. toilet

e. Pished................................Drunk.

f. Get It Up Yae !.....................And The Same To You !

g. Arse Bandit.........................Poof, gay person.

h. Amurny..............................I am not.

i. Away an bile yer heid...........Get stuffed !

j. Peel Wally...........................Pale or sickly looking.

k. Humphy Backit...................Someone with a hump or hunch back.

l. Ba heid...............................Someone with a round face, like a football, usually a bit stupid.

m. Baw bag............................Scrotum.

n. Dubble nuggit......................Two scoops of ice cream, sandwiched between two layers of thin wafer, each layer filled with nougat cream. Delicious !!

 

If I have missed anything, or made a mistake,

please feel free to rectify !!

 

Alan.........

I laughed at this and one of my Scottish cooleagues has announced that, apparently, I am about to "cop a dullyen". I say, that's a bit rich old chap, what!.

LoL very funny.