Wow! Imagine what she will get in settlement? shes landed on her foot aint she. :rofl:

I'm going to hell after this one....

 

A man is walking along a beach, when he walks past a young woman lying on a blanket, crying. The girl's face and figure are quite attractive, but she has no arms or legs. The man walks over and asks, "Excuse me, miss, why are you crying? Can I help you with something?"

 

The girl looks up at him and says, "I'm twenty-five years old, and I've never been kissed! Would you please kiss me, like a man kisses a woman?"

 

The man leans over her, and they kiss for several minutes, which she seems to appreciate. She thanks him, and he gets up and starts walking away. But then he hears her behind him, crying even louder than before. Being a nice guy, he goes back and asks, "What's wrong now? You've been kissed. Aren't you happy?"

 

"Yes, I'm happy that you kissed me," she says, "but I'm twenty-five years old, and no one's ever played with my breasts or my pussy."

 

So, once again, he obliges, and helps her out of her bathing suit, and lies down beside her. He plays with her for a while, which both of them enjoy. Then he helps her back into her bathing suit, and heads off again. Only to be brought back by her sobs, which are now louder than ever.

 

"What now?" he asks. "I've kissed you, I've played with you, I've told you how beautiful you are. Aren't you happy?"

 

"Yes," she says, "I'm happy for all that, but I'm twenty-five years old, and I've never been f*cked."

 

So he leans over, lifts her in his arms, walks down to the water's edge, throws her out as far as he can into the waves, and yells "YOU'RE F*CKED NOW!"

haha that's the original and better version of the joke posted earlier in the thread :D

 

what a classic!

damn didn't realise someone had popped that one up :D sorry! lol

I'm going to hell after this one....

 

A man is walking along a beach, when he walks past a young woman lying on a blanket, crying. The girl's face and figure are quite attractive, but she has no arms or legs. The man walks over and asks, "Excuse me, miss, why are you crying? Can I help you with something?"

 

The girl looks up at him and says, "I'm twenty-five years old, and I've never been kissed! Would you please kiss me, like a man kisses a woman?"

 

The man leans over her, and they kiss for several minutes, which she seems to appreciate. She thanks him, and he gets up and starts walking away. But then he hears her behind him, crying even louder than before. Being a nice guy, he goes back and asks, "What's wrong now? You've been kissed. Aren't you happy?"

 

"Yes, I'm happy that you kissed me," she says, "but I'm twenty-five years old, and no one's ever played with my breasts or my pussy."

 

So, once again, he obliges, and helps her out of her bathing suit, and lies down beside her. He plays with her for a while, which both of them enjoy. Then he helps her back into her bathing suit, and heads off again. Only to be brought back by her sobs, which are now louder than ever.

 

"What now?" he asks. "I've kissed you, I've played with you, I've told you how beautiful you are. Aren't you happy?"

 

"Yes," she says, "I'm happy for all that, but I'm twenty-five years old, and I've never been f*cked."

 

So he leans over, lifts her in his arms, walks down to the water's edge, throws her out as far as he can into the waves, and yells "YOU'RE F*CKED NOW!"

 

LMFAO :D

 

Class!!!