Until i was 18, i had not met my father, or his side of my family.

Upon meeting them all, i instantly took a shine to my uncle, more so than my father.

It seemed that from day one, we were clones of each other.

he moved 200 miles last year, to retire to the seaside even though he is only 57, just 10 miles from home, im now 35

I still, consider this guy to be the closest thing to a natural father i could have.

 

Last night at 2am, he had a fit in his sleep and was rushed into hospital

at 5pm tonight, we were told he has terminal cancer of the brain, liver and chest.

 

to say my world has fallen apart is not even close.

He does not know yet, and we are not sure to tell him or not.

I have just spent an hour writting him a letter, if we do tell him, i want him to read it, and to know what he means to me, if we dont tell him, he will never know.

 

Cancer is a prick, and has no mercy for anyone.

Yesterday, he was happy and gardening, and moaning that us bin men had not collected his bins again.

tonight, he is in a bed, on a drip with a cathetar in place, unaware he may not see christmas.

 

I have no idea why im saying this here, but for a moment anyway, it's helping.

 

Anyone want some words of advice????

 

tell the people who matter, that they matter. because tomorrow maybe too late...it is for me and my uncle

Really sorry to hear this bud. I cant imagine how you feel.

 

Something extremely similar happened to my girlfriends grandad a few months back. Luckily, he's still with us. In my opinion it would be best to tell him.

 

My thoughts are with you and your uncle.

Sorry to hear your news mate.

I know that having support from friends is important at a time

like this and I hope in a small way these messages help

 

Mick

Thanks all, very kind words.

 

I dont know why, but even thoughts from people i hve never met, still help in a small way.

 

thank you

mate i know kind of, where you are coming from, My best mate of nearly 20 years died a few weeks back just short of making 40!!

 

he had been fighting for a while but i was lucky enough to be able to have told him how much he meant to me, and how my life was better for meeting him..

 

i feel for you bud and my thoughts are with you as you get through..

I don't know you in the 'real life', but I'm still sorry to hear this. Be sure to tell him how you feel before it's to late, I can tell from experience that you will regret it if you don't.

 

Ken

hi bud, sorry to hear this bad news, its simply awful when you have news like that

 

my deepest sympathys

 

allan

As everyone has already said really bud!-really gutted for you :(

i know how u feel m8

 

cancer is a *******!!!

 

i lost my mum to it when i was 14

 

then my nanna which i was fairly close to not long after

 

i feel for you dude, i really do.

 

:( :( :(

deff tell him the score m8, u will regret it if u dont, tell him how u feel

 

i never had the chance to say bye to my mum

 

sumthing that will always regret

 

:( :( :(

Sit down and tell him your thoughts mate.

It will be no use saying later, "I wish I had"

 

My dads funeral was only 3 weeks ago, something similiar. No love lost between us, but so much could have, should have been said, but wasnt.

 

Feel for you.

 

99% of the guys on here who offered their thoughts I have never met, but their response was awesome. (thanx)

 

Be strong.

 

Alan.........

Thoughts are with you dude.

My thoughts are with you.

Mart. So sorry to hear the bad news.My dad and me havent spoke for several years, and hearing news like this makes me think that i would hate not having the chance to talk to him before its too late. My advice is talk to him, mate. You have the love and support of your family and friends at this awful time. All the best. Daf and John.

Not exactly the same as this situation, but myself and my sister fell out when I was sixteen and for various reasons we never made up, always thinking that there would be tomorrow. Tomorrow stopped coming five years ago, and I know from experience that you will find it hard to come to terms that you never told this man how you feel.

 

I am sorry for your trouble bud, but take advantage of the chance you have to say what you want to say. Hugh

Thats horrible mate, i'm really sorry to hear this :(

Sorry to hear this mate,

 

My thoughts are with you.

I could tell you what I konow but this is not the time...you need people with you that you know very well. All the best...& chin up M8..........He would not want you to be sad...IMHO. Very sad.

Martin as the title said, I realy dont know where to start and whot to say!

My farther passed away from a polmanry embilism just over 10 years ago

now,but he sufferd from cancer for two years befor so I know the road your heading down resonably well.

You are right cancer is a bast-ard and at the moment there is no total cure,dispite the hardwork that is taking place.

I can not give you any advice, the road is only yours to steer, each and averyone of us deals with these things in our own way. One thing I will say is not to change any thing you do drasticly and try to live a normal life as far as you can, live and feel the good things in life, sunny days, laughter and so on. I am shure your uncle would want life to continue as it is. I am also shure there is not much laughter and happyness around your family at the present,

but please remember that your memeries are there for ever, I am shure that

there are members on here that have been there too, and we will always

be there for you.

 

 

Best regards

 

Allan :(

So sorry to hear this bad news Martin, life is shit sometimes you won't think so now but it won't always be this bad. Both my parents had cancer, my Dad was told he wouldn't see Christmas but lived until the following August. I was really close to my stepfather too who also died some years later. Chin-up mate, he wouldn't want you to be so low.

Thanks to everyone who is posting and pm'ing, it's really touching.

The test's today didnt happen, they will be tomorrow now, and then they will let us know how long left he has.

 

His wife has decided, that he has the right to know, and has asked the doctor, to tell them togeather.

 

Once he has gotten that news and dealt with it in what ever way he can, i have decided that you are right, and i will have a heart to heart with him.

Just catching up reading through and saw this. What can I say that hasnt already been said? Nothing. All the best mate.

Thanks to everyone who is posting and pm'ing, it's really touching.

The test's today didnt happen, they will be tomorrow now, and then they will let us know how long left he has.

 

His wife has decided, that he has the right to know, and has asked the doctor, to tell them togeather.

 

Once he has gotten that news and dealt with it in what ever way he can, i have decided that you are right, and i will have a heart to heart with him.

 

 

 

 

Good luck m8, i am sure you will feel better for doing so. I think from reading the posts that i can safely say we will all be there with you in spirit to support you.

Sorry to hear the news :(

So sorry to hear this as my Mum had cancer so I know how you feel.

sorry to hear this bud, close family friend had similar problem earlier this year. after all thats said about them, cant praise the nhs staff enough for the way they treated him.

 

good luck with the tests.