top secret - microsft code

[ste]

all you it bods out there might find this amusing, the less it literate among you most likely won't! its an old one but still cracks me up.

 

: /*

: TOP SECRET Microsoft© Code

: Project: Chicago™

: Projected release-date: Summer 1998

: */

 

: #include "macos.h"

: #include "win31.h"

: #include "win95.h"

: #include "evenmore.h"

: #include "oldstuff.h"

: #include "billrulz.h"

: #define INSTALL = HARD

 

: char make_prog_look_big[1600000];

 

: void main()

: {

: while(!CRASHED)

: {

: display_copyright_message();

: display_bill_rules_message();

: do_nothing_loop();

: if (first_time_installation)

: {

: make_50_megabyte_swapfile();

: do_nothing_loop();

: totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();

: search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();

: hang_system();

: }

: write_something(anything);

: display_copyright_message();

: do_nothing_loop();

: do_some_stuff();

: if (still_not_crashed)

: {

: display_copyright_message();

: do_nothing_loop();

: basically_run_windows_3.1();

: do_nothing_loop();

: do_nothing_loop();

: }

: }

 

: if (detect_cache())

: disable_cache();

: >>>

: if (fast_cpu())

: {

: set_wait_states(lots);

: set_mouse(speed, very_slow);

: set_mouse(action, jumpy);

: set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);

: }

 

: /* printf("Welcome to Macintosh"); */

: /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11"); */

: /* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */

: printf("Welcome to Windows 98");

: if (system_ok())

: crash(to_dos_prompt);

: else

: system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp", O_CREATE);

 

: while(something)

: {

: sleep(5);

: get_user_input();

: sleep(5);

: act_on_user_input();

: sleep(5);

: }

: create_general_protection_fault();

: }

[Guest mickeyb]

WTF is that all about???:rolleyes:

[Guest senna]

I understood it.

 

Ill get me macintosh.

 

;)

[jock]

Originally posted by senna

I understood it.

 

Ill get me macintosh.

 

;)

 

 

Now thats funny .lol :)