My job is so frickin unbelievable. I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the people I work with:
First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.
The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her "womanly" parts. I think she might be a lesbian.
But the pick of the bunch has got to be the frickin stoner. And this guy is more than just your average stoner. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work. He probably hasn't been straight anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big ****ing dog to work. Every frickin day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single ****ing day.
Anyway, I drive these retards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shit.
My job is so frickin unbelievable. I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the people I work with:
First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.
The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her "womanly" parts. I think she might be a lesbian.
But the pick of the bunch has got to be the frickin stoner. And this guy is more than just your average stoner. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work. He probably hasn't been straight anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big ****ing dog to work. Every frickin day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single ****ing day.
Anyway, I drive these retards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shit.
Who am I ?